Update: Blog of 12/26/09

My blog is utterly inundated with trackbacks from across the globe. Past commenters on my posts include U2 frontman Bono, His Majesty King Mohammed IV of Morocco, and former UN Secretary-General Boutros-Boutros Ghali. I've written over three thousand mind-stimulating and thought provoking entries dating back to 1995, and I've received over ten million comments, all from unique ip ranges.There has never been a single spam comment post that lasted more than 0.25 seconds due to superior spam detection software which I have written myself and ported to several popular blogging packages. You cannot even begin to compare to me.

Neckbeard of the Day - 12/15/2009

Ladies and gentlebeards, I submit to your approval:

KING NECKBEARD

This guy is a class act. I am unfortunate enough to have a class with this smarmy individual. When he is not interjecting what his mind considers witty and sarcastic retorts to further his ultimate goal of impressing the pants off of the chubby neckbearded girl that sits to his left with his intellect, his hobbies include: computer science, world of warcraft, blogging, one-upsmanship, and bragging about being an atheist. All actions that this type of neckbeard undertake are solely to reinforce his sphere of influence amongst neckbeardkind. Neckbeards often engage in a form of mutual mental masturbation known as the neckbeard circlejerk, and the King neckbeard is the only neckbeard capable of effectively autofellating his own ego. This is the worst kind of neckbeard you will ever see OH GOD JUST LOOK AT THE LONG GREASY HAIR AND THE SMUG LITTLE GOATEE